The key to marriage longevity is matrimonial education. Yes, education. Just as higher education is the foundation of career success, relationship education is the key to marital success. No individual or couple knows everything about marriage relationships, and there is always more to learn.
We believe we don’t need relationship education, but we do. All of us. Think about it.
From the time we are infants we are taught skills to prepare us for life. Our schools provide the basics of reading, writing and math. Colleges and trade schools offer career instruction. Yet nothing prepares us to be husbands and wives. There is no specific curriculum for matrimonial training, yet we sign a license to practice this vocation without the skills to do it well.
Good marriages don’t happen by chance, rather they are the result of intentional effort.
How do we make our marriages last? How do we become better spouses? Through continuous learning. Through practice. Through growth. Through communication.
Steve has been providing marriage consulting services to couples for many years. Marriage consulting raises awareness of detrimental behaviors and teaches how those behaviors affect marriages. Steve observes couples interacting, tells them what he sees, and teaches them what he believes is necessary to redirect their path to long-term marriage success. Subtle altering of behavior dramatically affects relationships.
Trial lawyers must listen, observe, and quickly evaluate what they hear and see. As an expert trial lawyer and relationship expert, Steve is able to immediately recognize subtle behavior in couples that is detrimental to their marriages.
Marriage consulting is typically performed on weekends either in the couple’s home or in Steve’s offices. Steve’s availability for weekday appointments at his offices is limited only by his trial schedule. Marriage consulting is not intended to replace marriage counseling or marriage therapy services. Rather, it is an educational process designed to instantly raise awareness of detrimental behavior and helps clients to quickly alter their behavior. Marriage consulting also motivates couples when their relationships have become boring or stale. Steve teaches his clients how an absence of certain behavior is as detrimental to their marriages long-term as negative behavior. The couples actively participate in the entire process by openly sharing their feelings. Steve does not take sides and no one is judged or accused of being wrong. The results are immediate, dramatic and long lasting if clients put to use what they learn.
The cost of marriage consulting varies according to the client’s circumstances and needs, but it is based upon a reasonable per session fee. Sessions with Steve typically average an hour and a half. Clients complete a background/information questionnaire to be submitted to Steve in advance of the session. Steve will travel outside the Dallas area to provide marriage consulting with ample advanced scheduling.
Marriage consulting is not intended to be an ongoing weekly or monthly service; rather it is used by couples as part of their periodic marriage maintenance program, a marriage tune-up so to speak. Many clients often request follow up sessions as a result of the tremendous benefits they obtain.
Clients have told Steve they learned more in one session with him than they gained in months or years of counseling.
Invest in Your Relationship
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. So trite but so true. How much time and money would you spend to reduce the high risk of divorce and the emotional and financial devastation? How much time and money would you spend to get one or more of your significant needs better recognized and met by your spouse? Can you even put a price tag on that? Simply stated, no, you can’t!
Many couples spend small fortunes on their wedding day for a great party, but spend nothing to keep their relationship great. How much money does your family spend on entertainment each year? Compare that to what you spend each year keeping your relationship strong. Nothing to compare is there? The truth is, we generally spend nothing on relationship maintenance until our relationship goes into a ditch, then we spend lot’s of money on counseling not knowing whether the relationship can be saved or whether we even want to save it. Very often after the damage has been done, there may be no saving it!
Relationships, like most tangible things, deteriorate if they aren’t maintained. You can’t put your marriage on ice or in a vacuum sealed container to preserve it. You can’t ignore your relationship indefinitely and expect it to survive. It’s never too late to invest in your relationship. What do you risk losing by making that investment? Nothing! What do you risk losing if you don’t make that investment? Everything!
Just like your retirement or college funding program, now is the time to start. What bigger asset do you have in your life than your relationship? It’s never too early or too late to invest in you!
Winning the Marriage Gamble
Winning the Marriage Gamble explains by way of many examples, what both men and women must do to have really good marriages, or to maintain really good relationships longer, married or not.